What do you do when you’re tired of the prospect of dating? Two good friends with opposite relationship problems found themselves single at the same time. As an experiment, they dated for 40 days.
Love is a central theme in humanity across time and cultures. It’s one of the main topics in music, film, novels, poetry, and art. But what exactly is it, and why do we all approach it so differently? How does it affect us so deeply that sane people have gone mad over it?
The dating life in New York City can grow tiresome and wearing. Tim is afraid of commitment, often dating many girls at once, and he’s losing sight of what a healthy relationship means. Jessica is a hopeless romantic, jumping into relationships too quickly, always looking to find “the one.”
It’s been said that it takes 40 days to change a bad habit. In an attempt to explore and hopefully overcome their fears and inadequacies, Tim and Jessica will go through the motions of a relationship for the next 40 days: the commitment, time, companionship, joys and frustrations. Can they help each other, or will they fall into their same habits? Will they damage their friendship? What if they fall in love?Going through the motions, indeed. All the tropes are here: he's a player, she wants commitment, can they trust each other, weekly couples' therapy, and of course, eventually, sex -- is that a spoiler? Did anyone expect that there wouldn't be sex? All that's missing is the love, but maybe one of the pair will be able to drum up a small act of self-giving by day 40 to give the weary reader a sense that maybe there's actually a spark of humanity in these two, that self-absorption and endless analysis have not rendered them so sterile that they're incapable of even the smallest act of self-giving.
Still, someone's poured a lot of energy and effort into filming interviews, capturing text screenshots, pasting in emails, and creating graphix graphix graphix to pep up this sad, strange look at what passes for human interaction in a media-saturated age.
5 comments:
Dating is awful. I'm so glad I don't have to do that anymore.
This could be a cute story if they discovered that dating each other was just too awkward given that they were longtime friends.
Of course, it's not going to end that way.
I grow old... I grow old...
I shall have my artisanal website scrolled.
In the Sunday magazine section of the Washington Post, there is a feature called "Date Lab," where the Post pays for a night on the town (dinner, basically) for one couple that they (the Post) in their wisdom, have deemed compatible. When it's over whatever happens next is up to them. The episodes don't always end the same, but two things tend to happen most of the time:
1) In rating the evening from one to five (with five being the top), the man usually rates it higher than does the woman, and
2) After texting back and forth for a bit, one or both decide that their schedules simply cannot accommodate getting together at all, and both parties move on.
There is a lesson here somewhere. For a generation that claims not to be into "dating" as such, there is little in the way of a substitute. You have to wonder how the species is ever to be propagated at all. We can't seem to pencil it in between our self-important careers and our Pilates classes.
Great post, here is a 40 Days of Dating post that is explaining what happened actually.
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