You've been on every kind of diet, and nothing seems to work! It's time to try MrsDarwin's amazing program, in which YOU can lose TEN POUNDS in ONE DAY! This fantastic program allows you to eat almost anything you want while getting smiles and compliments from COMPLETE STRANGERS! It's almost too good to be true! Your friends will be so jealous!
The program is so easy to follow:
FIRST! gain thirty pounds! It's so easy, and you have nine months to pack it all on!
SECOND! Lose TEN POUNDS (at least!) in one day!*
THIRD! Relax as the next ten pounds just melt off over the course of the next three to six months! **
"I guarantee you'll love the results so much you'll follow my program again and again!"ACT NOW and you can get all MrsDarwin's secrets for the low price of just $159.00! Or, chose our convenient installment plan: 15 payments of just $15.99 each!***
Women only. Plan may cause aches, pains, nausea, increased appetite, loss of appetite, increased sexual desire, complete loss of sexual desire, drowsiness, insomnia, varicose veins, and strange marks on your abdomen.
*It won't be easy, but the weight loss is guaranteed.
**We take no responsibility for the last ten pounds; that's your lookout. You may never lose them.
***Absolutely no refunds.