Because most philosophies that frown on reproduction don't survive.

Tuesday, April 01, 2014

Pope Resigns Due To Blogger Pressure

Spring is shaping up to be the big news season for the Vatican, as yet another surprise resignation rocks the Catholic world:
In a shock April 1, 2014 announcement the Vatican has stated that Pope Francis is resigning today and Pope Benedict will resume his duties as Pope.

Pope Francis is quoted as naming two factors in his decision for resigning: 1. The rich Italian cooking that could get him up to 400 pounds if he stayed in Rome; and 2. Criticisms from Catholic blogs, especially in America. Noting that his predecessor had warned him about reading the blogs, Pope Francis was disturbed by the divisions his election had caused. “I do not want to be the cause of acrimony among Catholic bloggers. If I stay as Pope it could be another 'torture debate', and I doubt if Western civilization could survive that.”

As for Pope Benedict, he is described as rested, fit and rearing to resume his duties as Pope. Father Lombardi, Vatican press spokesman, said that Pope Benedict feels 75 after months of sleeping all night and eating hearty monastery food. As for blogs, Pope Benedict stopped reading them after the condom flap, according to Father Lombardi, although he conceded that the Pope did sneak a peak at Eye of the Tiber for a laugh now and then.

Read the rest...

Reaction to the surprise move was mixed, with arch traditionalists saying this was yet another shocking move to undermine doctrine and that now they've thought about it they don't like Benedict XVI much either.

1 comment:

Johnny Matos said...

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