Yes, folks, it's Offend An Author Day. Time to describe what author's work you could read under circumstances most inimical to the author's sensibility. First up:
Read Neil Postman's Amusing Ourselves to Death on your iPhone while talking on the phone and watching TV.
The only rule is: Your choice has to be either something you could actually do, or at least so inventive as to be forgivable. "Reading Jane Austen at an orgy," is right out, unless you in fact frequent orgies. Indeed, now I think of it, "at an orgy" is probably out regardless as being too broadly applicable and thus not inventive enough.
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The Blackadder Says:
Reading the copy of the Fountainhead you checked out of the public library.
Drinking a Budweiser while Roger Scruton's guide to wine.
Reading Atkins while bingeing on potato chips and gummy bears and drinking a cola.
Reading Atkins while bingeing on potato chips and gummy bears and drinking a cola.
Aw yeah, baby!
Read The God Delusion during Eucharistic Adoration.
Read Mercola in the waiting room as you're about to get all your child's CDC-recommended vaccines, including MMR.
Read Michael O'Brien book A Landscape With Dragons while wearing a Harry Potter costume.
Read Michael Pollan while buying Sam's Choice hot dogs and Twinkies at Wal-Mart.
Read Eat, Pray, Love while drinking, cursing, and hating.
Thought of that one after clicking "publish."
Did I mention I have work to do?
Reading Al Gore's Earth in the Balance in a speeding Hummer with the air conditioning on at full blast.
--wait--didn't Al Gore himself do that last week? Or was he in his private jet?
Reading "Atlas Shrugged" while making calls for a church charity fundraiser.
Read Bambi while making freshly-killed venison and rabbit into sausage.
It's funny how many of these are about food! I guess it goes to show how ideological people are about food at the moment.
Here in the land of John Knox, I contemplate reading his First Blast of the Trumpet Against the Monstrous Regiment of Women, while sitting in the St. Andrews Catholic chaplaincy, watching Her Majesty approve the new PM on BBC.
Though I suppose he might actually be thrilled that the Catholics of St. Andrews are reduced to a handful of elderly Scots and Italian immigrants, while HM's power is purely nominal.
Or, Eats, Shoots, and Leaves while texting.
+JMJ+
Reading A Clockwork Orange in a behavioural therapy programme.
Reading The da Vinci Code on an Opus Dei jet.
+JMJ+
I just thought of another one! =D
Reading Fahrenheit 451 by the light of a bonfire of banned books.
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